Thursday, July 06, 2006

Hoodies, dehydration, and trolling for Guardian readers...

Excellent thread on "the Haven" in Guardian Talk. The thread is entitled "There's several hooded youths gathered outside my house and it's a very hot evening - Should I offer them some water ?" and was started by "lansing". Here are the highlights (a horizontal line denotes an elipsis).

lansing - 08:19pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#4 of 109)

"two of them are talking quietly into mobile phones but I can't hear what they're saying. Maybe they're asking their friends to bring them some cold drinks or ice lollies."

lansing - 08:26pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#11 of 109)

"They've been joined by two other kids on mountain bikes but I see no lollies or cold drinks.

Isn't it great though that young people are cycling again.

I'll go out and ask them if they'd like some iced water. "

redder - 08:32pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#16 of 109)

"If you've put your garbage out, make sure you cut up your plastic six-pack holders or they may choke the little darlings' blowholes."

lansing - 08:35pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#20 of 104)

I brought them some water and now they're mostly standing in my front garden. I've asked them to watch my flowerbeds though.

Three of them have asked to use the toilet and they're now upstairs.

lansing - 08:44pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#29 of 104)

u lot r a bunsh of kunts

lansing - 08:49pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#35 of 104)

sorry for that post one of the kids asked me what I was doing and when I told him he typed it. They've left now but have told me they're coming back in 1/2 an hour for a party I'm not sure what to do now. To be frank I'm now a bit worried.

jean1 - 08:50pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#36 of 104)

Have the party, you'll enjoy it.

Leftie26 - 08:50pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#37 of 104)

You're making this up!

lansing - 08:55pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#39 of 104)

I have a table tennis table in the shed. I'd better get it out. I'll be gone for a while. I just hope I'm doing the right thing but I can't believe these kids aren't good. There's a right-wing guy at work always preaching hate and intolerance. When I tell him tomorrow just how good these kids are he'll realise just how wrong he is.

lansing - 09:03pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#52 of 109)

u lot r gay

BellaFiga - 09:03pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#53 of 109)

no we aren't. You are way too hot in that hoody.

lansing - 09:05pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#58 of 109)

we own dis huse

lapsedcat - 09:06pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#61 of 109)

Oh Lord - listen you punk! Put lansing on - I just want to know he/she is safe

BellaFiga - 09:06pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#62 of 109)

strictly speaking I don't think you do own dat huse. But nice Lansing is letting you have drinks and weewees.

lapsedcat - 09:13pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#66 of 109)

They're probably chasing him/her around the house, merrily happy-slapping

lansing - 08:49am Jul 5, 2006 GMT (#81 of 109)

I was released from hospital at 5am. unfortunately the kids were a bit too exuberant and gave me something to smoke. I'm not sure what it was but when I woke up I was in a park and they'd taken my shirt away.

MsToke - 10:41am Jul 5, 2006 GMT (#85 of 109)

we own dis huse

u lot r gay

Joo1s - 10:48am Jul 5, 2006 GMT (#86 of 109)

Quite. Anyone down wiv da yoof should know that it's "We pwn ths huse u luserz! LOL!".

Or something. Possibly with a "1337" in there somewhere. And wacky hand-gestures.

SinnerBoy - 12:13am Jul 6, 2006 GMT (#93 of 109)

It's all right, Lansing. I've been round with my shotgun - the survivors ran and I'm sure they won't be back. I'll probably do 35 years, but will you be grateful?

I doubt it.


lansing - 08:57am Jul 6, 2006 GMT (#94 of 109)

The kids came around again last night and one of them going by the name of 'd-man' (at least that's what I saw him 'tagging' my wall asked me if I had told the police. I said I had to for insurance purposes. he threatened to 'do me' if I spoke to them again. my neighbour called the police which was totally unwarranted in my opinion and I made my feelings clear to her after the kids were dispersed.

I think they'll come back tonight so I'm going to float a long-standing idea with them. It's for a local 'youth parliament' where the local authortity can fund a local platform for the kids to express their grievances and give them a much-needed voice to turn back the tide of social exclusion and alientation.

Initially I'll allow them in maybe two at a time. If I can invigorate one or two with this idea it can be a seed for change and flourish amongst the others.

I'll keep you all posted.