Nil Mussito

The dear leader is playing down suggestions of a national motto. This hasn't stopped every news programme, paper and website from presenting this as a fait accompli and asking for new slogans (sorry, mottoes) to build Brand Britain (I mean foster a sense of shared values, of course).

The soft pedalling of this is a shame. There is only one possible motto that reflects our shared values, with its self abasing passive aggression: imagine having "Mustn't Grumble" emblazoned on every public building in the UK. Maybe then we could change our theme song (sorry, national anthem) too:

Putin unveils his defence plans

Missiles aimed at Europe, sure. But I can't wait to see his "gigantic, humanoid robots.

Funnily enough - I didn't find the bit about robots to be the most disturbing part of that inteview.

In the not too distant future...

This evening, AD... some of my geekiest (therefore best) friends and I will be at the MST3K allnighter.

How can I explain MST3K? Perhaps via the lyrics to the theme song? Or perhaps you'd rather sit and watch. May I introduce Mike Nelson and his robot friends as they endure (as we will tonight) Hobgoblins:

Sudden onset of respect for Katie Melua

About 13 minutes in (although the rest of the video is well worth a watch):




Take a look at the Simon Singh article in the Guardian that sparked the "rewrite".

I'd be much more likely to buy the revised version - especially if a sinoanthropovelecipedologist can give us a passably accurate number (with p-values) of bicycles in Beijing.

Video from TED.

Billy-an Logic

If you can print onto thin cardboard, and have a fiver to spare, consider investing in these very stylich Logic Goats.

And if you prefer your logic to be more philosophical than mathematical, ponder these answers from various strands of philosophy to one of the most pressing problems of modern human existence.

Food for thought

The Scientific American has an update on research that lead to the caffeinated donught, with suggestions for future research.

What in the flinging, flying crap

This should probably go to Learned or Dreamed (please, please, say it was just a dream):



Maddest. Thing. Ever...

Trust me - I'm a scientist.

Productive day[1] - I've had one of my breakthrough hypotheses published in a mainstream forum[2], and had very positive peer review[3]. I should thank Dr Jeevani Mantotta and Dr David Corney for their useful comments in the development of my new theory.

[1] Only 0.4 times as constructive as if I were a man - see below.

[2]The Guardian Unlimited Talkboard

[3]
"MontyCristo - 12:23pm Jan 10, 2007 GMT (#67 of 102)

hahahaha!

Excellent "

Update: I've come to the conclusion that, being a mere woman, it's probably the best I'll ever do. Is it too late to retrain as something girly? A hooker perhaps?

Fun with Bayes

God exists - with at probability of .67. I want to see the priors for that!

Monster Mash

Popcorn at the ready

Trailer: James Cameron's Hamlet, Starring Arnold Schwarzenegger


Adverts: Cillit Bang


Main Feature: The Matr-erminator

Lightning man's trousers ruined

Not in the way I imagined

It is like when you light a match and eat it...

... 2 out of 12

The Guadrian (sic)

Big shout out to Kathleen for spotting that one. The original is here.

Addendum: In the interests of fairness I should say that the misspelling is probably the least interesting part of that article!

Let's zuiiken English

So it looked like Robertu san was having all the fun - til I found 'this

When bad things happen to good Google Calculator queries:

Hoodies, dehydration, and trolling for Guardian readers...

Excellent thread on "the Haven" in Guardian Talk. The thread is entitled "There's several hooded youths gathered outside my house and it's a very hot evening - Should I offer them some water ?" and was started by "lansing". Here are the highlights (a horizontal line denotes an elipsis).

---

lansing - 08:19pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#4 of 109)

"two of them are talking quietly into mobile phones but I can't hear what they're saying. Maybe they're asking their friends to bring them some cold drinks or ice lollies."

---

lansing - 08:26pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#11 of 109)

"They've been joined by two other kids on mountain bikes but I see no lollies or cold drinks.

Isn't it great though that young people are cycling again.

I'll go out and ask them if they'd like some iced water. "

---

redder - 08:32pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#16 of 109)

"If you've put your garbage out, make sure you cut up your plastic six-pack holders or they may choke the little darlings' blowholes."

---

lansing - 08:35pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#20 of 104)

I brought them some water and now they're mostly standing in my front garden. I've asked them to watch my flowerbeds though.

Three of them have asked to use the toilet and they're now upstairs.

---

lansing - 08:44pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#29 of 104)

u lot r a bunsh of kunts

---

lansing - 08:49pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#35 of 104)

sorry for that post one of the kids asked me what I was doing and when I told him he typed it. They've left now but have told me they're coming back in 1/2 an hour for a party I'm not sure what to do now. To be frank I'm now a bit worried.

---

jean1 - 08:50pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#36 of 104)

Have the party, you'll enjoy it.

Leftie26 - 08:50pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#37 of 104)

You're making this up!

---

lansing - 08:55pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#39 of 104)

I have a table tennis table in the shed. I'd better get it out. I'll be gone for a while. I just hope I'm doing the right thing but I can't believe these kids aren't good. There's a right-wing guy at work always preaching hate and intolerance. When I tell him tomorrow just how good these kids are he'll realise just how wrong he is.

---

lansing - 09:03pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#52 of 109)

u lot r gay


BellaFiga - 09:03pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#53 of 109)

no we aren't. You are way too hot in that hoody.

---

lansing - 09:05pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#58 of 109)

we own dis huse

---

lapsedcat - 09:06pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#61 of 109)

Oh Lord - listen you punk! Put lansing on - I just want to know he/she is safe


BellaFiga - 09:06pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#62 of 109)

strictly speaking I don't think you do own dat huse. But nice Lansing is letting you have drinks and weewees.

---

lapsedcat - 09:13pm Jul 4, 2006 GMT (#66 of 109)

They're probably chasing him/her around the house, merrily happy-slapping

---

lansing - 08:49am Jul 5, 2006 GMT (#81 of 109)

I was released from hospital at 5am. unfortunately the kids were a bit too exuberant and gave me something to smoke. I'm not sure what it was but when I woke up I was in a park and they'd taken my shirt away.

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MsToke - 10:41am Jul 5, 2006 GMT (#85 of 109)

we own dis huse

u lot r gay




Joo1s - 10:48am Jul 5, 2006 GMT (#86 of 109)

Quite. Anyone down wiv da yoof should know that it's "We pwn ths huse u luserz! LOL!".

Or something. Possibly with a "1337" in there somewhere. And wacky hand-gestures.

---

SinnerBoy - 12:13am Jul 6, 2006 GMT (#93 of 109)

It's all right, Lansing. I've been round with my shotgun - the survivors ran and I'm sure they won't be back. I'll probably do 35 years, but will you be grateful?

I doubt it.

In fact, YOU WONT TAKE ME ALIVE, COPPER!

---

lansing - 08:57am Jul 6, 2006 GMT (#94 of 109)

The kids came around again last night and one of them going by the name of 'd-man' (at least that's what I saw him 'tagging' my wall asked me if I had told the police. I said I had to for insurance purposes. he threatened to 'do me' if I spoke to them again. my neighbour called the police which was totally unwarranted in my opinion and I made my feelings clear to her after the kids were dispersed.

I think they'll come back tonight so I'm going to float a long-standing idea with them. It's for a local 'youth parliament' where the local authortity can fund a local platform for the kids to express their grievances and give them a much-needed voice to turn back the tide of social exclusion and alientation.

Initially I'll allow them in maybe two at a time. If I can invigorate one or two with this idea it can be a seed for change and flourish amongst the others.

I'll keep you all posted.

"I have pressure, you have pressure"

"Is my penis attached to your mother?"

Possibly the strangest thing I've ever heard.


For more elevated debate - don't watch that, watch this.

Guardian has a "Daily Mail" moment?

From the "Technically true but nonetheless slightly misleading" file:

"Jeanne Wilding dumped oil, animal corpses and broken glass on neighbours' drives while blasting out choral works depicting rape and murder in the middle of the night."

I heard these choral works on radio 4 this morning. The controversial opus? Carmina Burana. So yes - very distessing played throughout the night, as any loud music would be. But the "rape and murder" - surely only offensive if you happen to know 13th century monastic vernacular!

The Son's of Owain Glen-Bap

One of the things I love about living part time in Wales is learning about their long and proud cultural heritage. See Lyewellyn's post. So that's why my sandwiches are served bent!

Grey Matters Ltd

I keep seeing this van in Aber:

It's possibly he funniest vehicle I've ever seen (but then again I am terrified of clown cars).

The text reads

Grey Matters Ltd

24 Hour Emergency Philosopher

Don't even think about it, call us instead!

• 
  Same day service within the M25
  


• 
  All thought considered from an inkling to a eureka!
  


• 
  10% discount when you mention Tarski's argument that the model theoretic characterization of logical consequence os more basic than its characterization in terms of a deductive system
  

I think that's funny - maybe I've been a logician too long...